Actually I hate myself. I feel So so much depressed of what i got into. I Don't know what the Hell happened to me in this life. So far i wish i could finish my life with my own hands but there are too many things keep me from doing such a cruel thing according to people, relief thing to me.
I'm in a daily struggle with everything i am. I'm fighting every demon possessing my soul. I'm trying to kill the inner bad Sarah existing, and eating the Good Sarah alive But I'm Failing So hard.
I'm trying most of the times to accept this, this whole new situation of the new me. Try to climate and go with the flow. But I Fail hard Again. I guess i hate and i can't help to swallow it.
Do i need To love myself while every one around hating me, annoying me, criticizing me and Keep telling me I'm not good Enough, I don't look good enough .. If i were somebody else!? , if i look in someway else?!!
Do i Need to edit and re-correct my manners while everything around me just collapsing, falling down, crashing over me?!!
Why do i need to?
If i mean to my family, my friends, the people and the one who loves me .. A Face, A Body with a certain weight, A look, Clothes and A Typical Manner to Fit in Their World. Then I'd Be Nothing To Myself.
I'd be Just A Doll with Strings, Just A Marionette.
I'm in a daily struggle with everything i am. I'm fighting every demon possessing my soul. I'm trying to kill the inner bad Sarah existing, and eating the Good Sarah alive But I'm Failing So hard.
I'm trying most of the times to accept this, this whole new situation of the new me. Try to climate and go with the flow. But I Fail hard Again. I guess i hate and i can't help to swallow it.
Do i need To love myself while every one around hating me, annoying me, criticizing me and Keep telling me I'm not good Enough, I don't look good enough .. If i were somebody else!? , if i look in someway else?!!
Do i Need to edit and re-correct my manners while everything around me just collapsing, falling down, crashing over me?!!
Why do i need to?
If i mean to my family, my friends, the people and the one who loves me .. A Face, A Body with a certain weight, A look, Clothes and A Typical Manner to Fit in Their World. Then I'd Be Nothing To Myself.
I'd be Just A Doll with Strings, Just A Marionette.
هناك تعليقان (2):
لحد دلوقتي انتي مش عارفة انتي ايه بالنسبة للناس اللي حواليكي و قد ايه انتي كويسة
حبي نفسك يا سارة لانها فعلا تستاهل انها تتحب
و كفاية كل الجلد ده لنفسك لانها مش هتستحملو
والله الكلام ده كان في وقت صعب صعب مش هاتتخيله .. طبيعي هاكتب كلام كارهة فيه نفسي يعني
بس دلوقتي أحسن .. فيه حاجات حلوة D:
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